7 Steps to Owning Your Worth
Last week, on the night of the full moon, I stood in the shower, water streaming down my face and neck, bowled over by my conniving and merciless inner saboteur, and sobbed my little heart out.
“I forgive you”, I whispered, with my eyes closed.
Unraveled, spent and present, awareness washed through me…
Your worth is immeasurable.
You don’t need to improve, fix, push down, play small, hide away.
You are unfolding. You’re peeling back layers.
After a few quiet moments, I dropped my arms with a sigh of relief and cried.
I cried at the recognition of my impermanence.
I cried at the recognition of all the times I’d put myself last.
I cried at the recognition of how much I was still waiting.
After all these years, I was still waiting to feel taken care of by the world, instead of sinking deeply and wholly into taking care of myself. There were still so many more layers of depth to my own experience of self-love.
We do this all the time. Wait for the world to take care of us.
We wait to fall in love, or fall back in love with our partner, so we can start building a life together.
We wait until we feel better in our bodies, so we can then do this, that or the other.
We wait to hear what they want, what their plans are, what they think, so we can make plans for ourselves.
In the meantime… we struggle, we try to figure it out, we get by.
But… “in the meantime” is where life happens.
In the meantime… you are alive.
Struggling, hoping and waiting is a completely unsustainable approach. It doesn’t give us more energy, more life force, more incentive and more motivation to keep going – it gives us less.
What if, YOU are it?
What if, your primary responsibility in your entire life is to take care of you?
Having the kind of life that nourishes the feelings you crave means living a life of ever-increasing acceptance and ease. Acceptance feels like relief. That’s the feeling you are reaching for. It feels lighter, softer and free.
It means giving yourself the experiences that you think those other things will give you.
It means not only talking about self-love, but living it.
When struggle shows up, as it will for us all, use it as a red flag to go inward and tend to you. Connect with that part of yourself that you have been judging, rejecting and denying, and try instead to reach for acceptance.
Here’s what that looks like:
- Witness the voice of ego (aka your inner critic) without judgment when it rears its ugly head.
You take YOU everywhere you go. The internal conversation you have with yourself day in and day out colours your entire life. Until you learn to tame the maddening monkey chatter of your mind and start living more from your soul space – there is no peace.
- Allow your breath to be your guide back to peace.
That harsh inner voice isn’t being realistic or telling it like it is. Your inner voice is kind, supportive, loving. Unconditional.
- Forgive – yourself and others (but especially you).
You can’t love yourself if you’re still holding judgments about yourself. Forgiving yourself is a huge step in the process of becoming free. Release those past experiences (those chains are really what’s crippling you) and embrace a new reality. Try not to get hung up about the how and instead allow. When you accept forgiveness as your plan for happiness, then love will lead the way.
- Lay in the sun.
Seriously – vitamin D is the one stop cure.
- Move your beautiful body with joy.
Moving your body in ways that you love gives you easy access to those warm and fuzzy feel-good feelings. Exercise aids in deep breathing, gives you clarity and builds self-respect.
- Eat plants (nom nom nom).
Eating real food as mama nature intended, helps to remove “soot” that has built up in your body and leads to incredible cleansing. You will feel a sense of absolute relief, ever increasing energy and healing on multiple levels – physically, mentally, emotionally.
Smiling has been scientifically shown to increase serotonin (one of the master feel-good hormones in our brain) in both the giver and the receiver. See? Better already. 😉
How do you feel about this approach to self-love? What is it that you would like to practice accepting about yourself?
Open your beautiful heart and share with me in the comments below, you just might inspire someone else to have their own breakthrough.
It’s time to love the one you are entrusted with.
Self-love is your job.